Inside my head
By: Austin Ramsey
Date: 9th Jul 2021
Why did OPW have to close? It all keeps coming back to these companies closing when I’m flying high, and my star is burning. Am I even “The Phoenix” anymore? Yeah, sure, they rise from the dead and stuff but am I really taking off and burning the Earth beneath me?
I don’t want to be here. My anxiety is through the roof, and I know why but I can’t say it aloud. I have to keep so much to myself these days. I have Todrick with me all the time, but I feel so alone. In time, he’ll grow tired of me like all the rest, and then what? Why is she looking at me like that? Am I talking out loud? Fuck my life, wait, no, I’m not. She must want the sausage. I’m more than a piece of meat now, lady.
Austin grunts and takes off his shirt. She walks over, and he tenses as she gets closer and begins to fumble with the blood pressure cuff. She takes his arm and rubs it before putting the cuff on and telling him to relax. He is the opposite of relaxed.
There is a lot to say here; if Todrick were in the room, he would’ve checked her. I’ve still been getting used to doing that on my own, I suppose. What do I say? What do I do? I don’t like it, but Toddy also says I can’t be a jerk. Gah, I’m so confused. Where is my notebook? What am I supposed to do? I’m sick of getting in trouble, and if they tell Toddy, will I get the couch?
At the mention of a husband, the nurse tenses up, and she looks at his ring finger again, and he is not wearing a ring. Austin looks away and sighs. She finally starts to do her job. She manually takes his vitals and enters them into the computer. She looks over at Austin, who is giving her a disgusted look. She scurries out of the room.
WTF over? Did that happen? Would I have ended up on the couch for that? I didn’t do nothing, but I seem to get in trouble when I do nothing. It isn’t fair. I hate the couch because, well, I hate the couch. I like knowing that Toddy is right there in front of me. So when giraffe Austin wakes up, he is happy. Giraffe, hehe. I like giraffes, they are long andÖ
Do I call Toddy and tell him what just happened? With my past, will he even believe me? I don’t believe me. Why am I still shirtless? This is OPW’s fault. Fuck them! Who told them to close. Who told them to make me face change? I hate those fuckers!
AUSTIN RAMSEY Once again, I’m on the top of my game, and once again, I’m denied. Why did they even sign me? I should’ve quit this bullshit after F2B. I didn’t need it anymore. Who is to blame? It’s not my fault. Fucking Sam. It’s his fault. Yeah, he and Xavier were all sign up for this bullshit OPW. It’s good, Austin, they said. Fuck them! Why is Toddy wrestling? Why does NO one understand what it does to me to see anyone put their hands on him? I want to FUCKING RIOT! Sure he is capable of handling himself, but he’s my responsibility, right?
His mom made that very clear. She said she had been watching on TV and she was proud of me. She can see the love. I don’t want Toddy wrestling. Shit, is that the real issue here? I don’t want him wrestling. Is that me being a toxic partner? He can handle himself, but I don’t like seeing someone put his hands on him in any capacity. It’s this tag team, no Royal Anarchy with Toddy, and no one hits him.
HATTIE MAE RUTHERFORD-TABOR Iím calling you Austin. I saw you filming my baby-making gumbo a few days, and you didn’t talk to him for a few days, but you sprung this wedding and day on a yacht on us. I wanna know how this equates to love?
What is this? Another attempt to break us up? Another person that wants to hit him and then put shit in his mind? No, No, No, Austin, that’s his mother. She only wants the best for him. She’s never called you before? Did Amari Kent put her up to this? That’s the bitch that broke Alexis’ heart. She was completely innocent, and he carried on an entire relationship publicly that broke her heart. He could want Toddy to be heartless because of me. The haters always bring that up if either of us is at a halt.
I see him at the hotel bar with Sam Chatman. We supposedly made peace but fuck that dude. Yeah, fuck him. What. Who is this dude handing me a tequila shot? Sam and Toddy are looking at me with glasses raised. FUCK THAT DUDE! Little brother, my ass. I hate him.
I’m breaking this shit up tonight. I’ll be the second in Royal Anarchy to fix this. No one, absolutely no one, is putting their hands on my baby after Blood Money. I’m taking his phone. I love and hate you, Chatman. Todrick is mine now, right? Isn’t that what our vows were about? Love, Honor, and Obey me bitch! I’m Daddy, not that overgrown shrimp. It’s my dick you ride. Why are they coming over here?
Two shots of tequila are set in front of Austin. He grabs one, and Sam holds the other one, and Austin’s brow furrows. Todrick sees Austin’s eyes go dark and orders four shots to make up for the one Austin missed. They take the shot, and Todrick tries to throw it over his shoulder, but he sees Austin a lot more alert than usual and takes the shot.
Austin buys two more rounds of shots. Todrick looks excited, and Sam smirks. The and other girls and guys that recognize them come over, and Sam interacts with them. Todrick looks at Austin, who downs another shot. His blood is burning because he doesn’t want to share Todrick with them, but rational Austin is gone now. He shrugs, expecting Todrick to get the no out of that, but that backfired, and now Sam and Todrick are knees deep in fans, and he is pissed.
AUSTIN RAMSEY Sup little whore biscuits. Ohhh donít gimme shit. Youís guys all want me to fight Toddy in that stupid Lbood? Is the B silent? No is it..blood? Is it fucking blood? Iím going with Blood Money match. This match can suck my fat nut sack and my even fatter cock. Yeah, yous hoes seent it. Itís big huh? Grammarly can lick my nut sack with the closed captioning too. Hahaha. Iím not a drunk, you are.
Fuck this stupid match, cause letís face it. I got Todrickís back and better not nobody touch him. Hic. I got hiccups bitch. Deal with it you little asswipe. Yep, but Toddy ainít gonna wrestle no more after this so youís bums better not touch him! When this.
AUSTIN RAMSEY: Weeeee. Iím nota putting my hands on my wife. Wait..wife? Iím fucking confused, that ass tho. Umm no more wrestling for Tabor-Ramsey, I give a fuck what anyone else does. I needa take Samís phone cause no post, means no Royal Anarchy. Imma smaat dude. Oh itís right here, thatís easy. Now Imma drunk but Iím done. Hic. Sorry Fight! NYC, no Samuel Chatman. But hopefully no more Todrick Tabor-Ramsey when itís over. He can be my manager. You make me change? Fuck you! I a hate change. You knew that. You did this when I was at the top of game. FUCK YOU! Hic. Hey baby.