Inside my head

By: Austin Ramsey

Date: 9th Jul 2021

Why did OPW have to close? It all keeps coming back to these companies closing when I’m flying high, and my star is burning. Am I even “The Phoenix” anymore? Yeah, sure, they rise from the dead and stuff but am I really taking off and burning the Earth beneath me?

AUSTIN RAMSEY: Huh?

CLINIC NURSE: Austin, are you ready to head back so I can take your vitals?

AUSTIN RAMSEY: Yeah, sure.

I don’t want to be here. My anxiety is through the roof, and I know why but I can’t say it aloud. I have to keep so much to myself these days. I have Todrick with me all the time, but I feel so alone. In time, he’ll grow tired of me like all the rest, and then what? Why is she looking at me like that? Am I talking out loud? Fuck my life, wait, no, I’m not. She must want the sausage. I’m more than a piece of meat now, lady.

CLINIC NURSE: Austin, please sit down and remove your shirt.

Why do I need to remove my shirt? It has no sleeves. What kind of sex shop is this? I don’t wanna, and that’s saying something because I hate shirts.

Austin grunts and takes off his shirt. She walks over, and he tenses as she gets closer and begins to fumble with the blood pressure cuff. She takes his arm and rubs it before putting the cuff on and telling him to relax. He is the opposite of relaxed.

CLINIC NURSE: Your arm is too big for this cuff. I’ll need to take your pressure manually.

AUSTIN RAMSEY: My arm is normal.

There is a lot to say here; if Todrick were in the room, he would’ve checked her. I’ve still been getting used to doing that on my own, I suppose. What do I say? What do I do? I don’t like it, but Toddy also says I can’t be a jerk. Gah, I’m so confused. Where is my notebook? What am I supposed to do? I’m sick of getting in trouble, and if they tell Toddy, will I get the couch?

CLINIC NURSE: Oh, you have a special sized arm.

And you are a specially sized twat waffle.

AUSTIN RAMSEY: I assure you, the only thing special about me is my ability to love my husband.

At the mention of a husband, the nurse tenses up, and she looks at his ring finger again, and he is not wearing a ring. Austin looks away and sighs. She finally starts to do her job. She manually takes his vitals and enters them into the computer. She looks over at Austin, who is giving her a disgusted look. She scurries out of the room.

WTF over? Did that happen? Would I have ended up on the couch for that? I didn’t do nothing, but I seem to get in trouble when I do nothing. It isn’t fair. I hate the couch because, well, I hate the couch. I like knowing that Toddy is right there in front of me. So when giraffe Austin wakes up, he is happy. Giraffe, hehe. I like giraffes, they are long andÖ

The door opens, and the doctor enters the room.

This dude looks like a fake nerd. This guy just bought a pair of reading glasses and wore them at the bridge of his nose to look smart. Fuck this asswipe. No, no, no.

DOCTOR: Hello Austin. I hear you and the last nurse didn’t hit it off. Perhaps I will be more to your liking. Please take off your shorts.

Austin’s eyes narrow to slits.

WTF is this? Okay, is this a test Todrick set up? There is no way, like no way, this shit is real.

AUSTIN RAMSEY: Excuse me doc, my shorts?

Where are the fucking cameras? Ha, Ashton is going to jump out at any minute.

The doctor walks over and begins to try to lift Austin off the table. Austin’s reflexes kick in, and he kicks the doctor. He looks shocked but grabs his shirt and walks out.

Dafuq was that? FUUUUUUCK! Am I gonna get in trouble if they call Todrick? This is SO not fair. I was a good boy.

Austin runs out of the clinic and gets into his car, and locks the door.

Do I call Toddy and tell him what just happened? With my past, will he even believe me? I don’t believe me. Why am I still shirtless? This is OPW’s fault. Fuck them! Who told them to close. Who told them to make me face change? I hate those fuckers!

A tear rolls down Austin’s face in a rare moment of vulnerability. He was finally 100% safe, and no one was around.

AUSTIN RAMSEY FUCK THEM!

He begins to beat on the steering wheel.

AUSTIN RAMSEY Once again, I’m on the top of my game, and once again, I’m denied. Why did they even sign me? I should’ve quit this bullshit after F2B. I didn’t need it anymore. Who is to blame? It’s not my fault. Fucking Sam. It’s his fault. Yeah, he and Xavier were all sign up for this bullshit OPW. It’s good, Austin, they said. Fuck them! Why is Toddy wrestling? Why does NO one understand what it does to me to see anyone put their hands on him? I want to FUCKING RIOT! Sure he is capable of handling himself, but he’s my responsibility, right?

His mom made that very clear. She said she had been watching on TV and she was proud of me. She can see the love. I don’t want Toddy wrestling. Shit, is that the real issue here? I don’t want him wrestling. Is that me being a toxic partner? He can handle himself, but I don’t like seeing someone put his hands on him in any capacity. It’s this tag team, no Royal Anarchy with Toddy, and no one hits him.

A horn honks behind Austin. He snaps out of his thoughts.

AUSTIN RAMSEY: Hey fucktard!…oh

The light turned green. Guess that’s my bad. But it was only a second.

Incoming call from Todrickís Mom

Austin nervously pushes the button on the steering wheel to accept the call.

AUSTIN RAMSEY Hello, Ms. Rutherford-Tabor. Are you looking for me or Toddy?

HATTIE MAE RUTHERFORD-TABOR Iím calling you Austin. I saw you filming my baby-making gumbo a few days, and you didn’t talk to him for a few days, but you sprung this wedding and day on a yacht on us. I wanna know how this equates to love?

Austin pauses; this was far from his thoughts at the moment. The call drops.

What is this? Another attempt to break us up? Another person that wants to hit him and then put shit in his mind? No, No, No, Austin, that’s his mother. She only wants the best for him. She’s never called you before? Did Amari Kent put her up to this? That’s the bitch that broke Alexis’ heart. She was completely innocent, and he carried on an entire relationship publicly that broke her heart. He could want Toddy to be heartless because of me. The haters always bring that up if either of us is at a halt.

I see him at the hotel bar with Sam Chatman. We supposedly made peace but fuck that dude. Yeah, fuck him. What. Who is this dude handing me a tequila shot? Sam and Toddy are looking at me with glasses raised. FUCK THAT DUDE! Little brother, my ass. I hate him.

I’m breaking this shit up tonight. I’ll be the second in Royal Anarchy to fix this. No one, absolutely no one, is putting their hands on my baby after Blood Money. I’m taking his phone. I love and hate you, Chatman. Todrick is mine now, right? Isn’t that what our vows were about? Love, Honor, and Obey me bitch! I’m Daddy, not that overgrown shrimp. It’s my dick you ride. Why are they coming over here?

Two shots of tequila are set in front of Austin. He grabs one, and Sam holds the other one, and Austin’s brow furrows. Todrick sees Austin’s eyes go dark and orders four shots to make up for the one Austin missed. They take the shot, and Todrick tries to throw it over his shoulder, but he sees Austin a lot more alert than usual and takes the shot.

Austin buys two more rounds of shots. Todrick looks excited, and Sam smirks. The and other girls and guys that recognize them come over, and Sam interacts with them. Todrick looks at Austin, who downs another shot. His blood is burning because he doesn’t want to share Todrick with them, but rational Austin is gone now. He shrugs, expecting Todrick to get the no out of that, but that backfired, and now Sam and Todrick are knees deep in fans, and he is pissed.

Austin opens decides to go Live on his phone from the bar. He orders 21 shots and the bartenders pours as he talks.

AUSTIN RAMSEY: Whatís up, Rockstars..oh wait. That ain’t me. Hey Turdburglers..oh wait, that ain’t me. Sup bitches! I’m a shot coming to you live from…

Austin looks around the bar and grabs the person next to him.

AUSTIN RAMSEY What is you name?

Austin does not wait.

AUSTIN RAMSEY That group right there, no one is to ever go empty on a tequila shot you dig?[/color]

The dude nods, and Austin looks into his phone and smiles. He’s a bit buzzed but when has that ever stopped him.

AUSTIN RAMSEY Sup little whore biscuits. Ohhh donít gimme shit. Youís guys all want me to fight Toddy in that stupid Lbood? Is the B silent? No is it..blood? Is it fucking blood? Iím going with Blood Money match. This match can suck my fat nut sack and my even fatter cock. Yeah, yous hoes seent it. Itís big huh? Grammarly can lick my nut sack with the closed captioning too. Hahaha. Iím not a drunk, you are.

Fuck this stupid match, cause letís face it. I got Todrickís back and better not nobody touch him. Hic. I got hiccups bitch. Deal with it you little asswipe. Yep, but Toddy ainít gonna wrestle no more after this so youís bums better not touch him! When this.

Dafuq you looking at Cujo? Yeah, walk away. Huh? Yeah, another round. Iím busy asshole. Iímma famous and shooting a movie. Go away from me with that Apollo. Iím not a drunk, you are.

Austin clears his throat as he downs two more shots.

AUSTIN RAMSEY: Weeeee. Iím nota putting my hands on my wife. Wait..wife? Iím fucking confused, that ass tho. Umm no more wrestling for Tabor-Ramsey, I give a fuck what anyone else does. I needa take Samís phone cause no post, means no Royal Anarchy. Imma smaat dude. Oh itís right here, thatís easy. Now Imma drunk but Iím done. Hic. Sorry Fight! NYC, no Samuel Chatman. But hopefully no more Todrick Tabor-Ramsey when itís over. He can be my manager. You make me change? Fuck you! I a hate change. You knew that. You did this when I was at the top of game. FUCK YOU! Hic. Hey baby.

Austin nods and pushes the stop button. Todrick has him now. Let the Ramsey plan begin.