[JmOnt] A Gift for? And a Phoenix down! [PoWeRmOvEs]
By: Joe Montuori
Writing Prompt: Yes
Date: 11th Dec 2021
THE FALL OF THE PHOENIX
[Candy cane dust to the eye is something that is not fun. It stings, it causes blurred vision and hurts when you blink. And because of this, I have an appointment today with Jacqueline Muller. She is one of the top Ophthalmologists in all of New York City. “When you have money, people suddenly make the impossible possible, or in this situation, open their office on a Saturday to help pick out these remaining candy cane shavings from my eye.” Since my match with Jenna Fenix, everyday the vision is getting better. I can see fine, it’s just a little blurry at times and I still feel like there is some dust in there. But I got the best money can buy so I know by the end of the day I will be back to my 20-20 vision.]
[Getting ready for this appointment, you can see J Mont walking out of the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around his waist. He looks into the mirror and you can only imagine the thoughts in his head looking at himself. “Damn, I look good.” “Look at these Abs.” If I was a woman, I would jump all over me.” And before he could think of another thing to say in his mind, here comes Mia from behind. She wraps her arms around and kisses the back of his neck.]
Mia: Hey hubby, you want some more of this?
[J Mont turns around and is now looking directly at Mia. He starts to squint his eyes a little. Is he playing games with her or is his eyes truly hurting still? I guess we are about to find out.]
J Mont: [As he wipes his eyes one more time.] Allie, is that you?
Mia: [Makes a fist with her hand.] What did you fuckin say Joe?
[J Mont starts to laugh, but Mia doesnt seem amused at all about what was just said. I guess the long history and issues with Allison is still a sore subject. I guess J Mont used the wrong name if he was joking around.]
J Mont: Baby, I was kidding. Ok i probably used the worst name as a joke but come on now. You wanted the funny, cocky, gun slinging old J Mont back. Here I am.
Mia: [Lets her fist loose.] I know, but just that small thought that you could leave one day.
[J Mont cuts her off and puts his finger to her lip.]
J Mont: Never say that again OK? We are in this together and nothing is going to ever stop us. We are getting married soon and you are going to be the future mother of our child. It’s me and you.
[Mia, blushing and smiling, jumps into J Mont’s arms as he carries her to the bed. And you know what happens next.]
1 Hour Later
[J Mont sitting at the end of his bed putting on the new Air Jordans he just got. They were released today, but J Mont knows Michael Jordan personally so he got his early. The Legendary Air Jordan 11 Cool Grey. He has the match sweat suit already on to go with it. Mia, just laying in bed looking exhausted smiles at her man and he crawls over and gives her a big kiss on the lips.]
J Mont: Get some rest babes and sorry about that big hand print on your ass. I couldn’t help it. All those squats your doing is making your ass bigger in a good way.
[Mia laughs and turns over to get some rest as J Mont leaves the bedroom and heads on out.]
[Once again, when you have money, you can get anything you want when you want. J Mont wanted to be the first person to have the 2023 Mercedes AMG G63 G Wagon. And he got it. Not even Jay Leno or Mark Cuban got ahead of J Mont for this special vehicle. Yes we are still in 2021 and this is 2023, but when you got money, that TALKS. Sitting in the driver’s seat being the MAN, J Mont shifts the vehicle into drive and he is on his way.]
J Mont: I could be a truly rich snob and get myself a Bentley Limo, wait, I have one of those already. I guess what I’m saying is I could hire a butler like Geoffrey and have him drive me around everywhere, but I like getting behind the wheel and pretending this is a grand theft auto sometimes. I don’t want some guy looking like Dane Preston, opening my doors or carrying my bags.
[J Mont steps on the gas and starts to weave in and out of traffic. And if he does get pulled over, he will just laugh about it since half the police department is on his payroll or related to him.]
J Mont: Shit, I forgot to make that call.
[J Mont hits the phone button on the steering wheel, and the blue tooth is engaged.]
J Mont: Dial 1-800-352-4477
[And if anyone is wondering, that is a real number. It’s for Frito Lay Company who is responsible for making those Cool Ranch Doritos. And after a few rings, someone actually picked up the phone.]
Operator: Thank you for calling Frito Lay. How may I direct your call?
J Mont: I need to speak to someone about getting some special Doritos made. Price is no object.
Operator: Hold please.
[J Mont, sitting on hold and in traffic. Waiting patiently until it happens. “Hangin Tough” by New Kids on the Block play for the hold music.]
J Mont: I swear to fuckin god. I’m gonna use any amount of money i have to buy the rights to elevator music, holding music…….ahhh this fuckin music sucks my left nut.
Operator: Mr Nut, we have Calvin here who can further assist you.
J Mont: Thank you.
Calvin: So Mr. Nut, I hear you have some questions about cool ranch….
J Mont: Its Joe, not Mr. Nut you screech powers looking, steve urkel wearing jackass.
Calvin: There is nothing wrong with having curly hair and wearing suspenders.
J Mont: Listen, all i need is 10 Large bags of Cool Ranch Doritos, but here is the catch, i need Steroids inserted into them.
Calvin: We don’t have access to that.
J Mont: I have the damn money, I can wire it to you right now and I need this done like yesterday.
Calvin: So you want Steroid Cool Ranch Doritos?
J Mont: Yes, that’s exactly what I want. I need them also in a nice box, gift wrapped and delivered to Fight Tower by Monday afternoon.
Calvin: It’s Saturday sir.
J Mont: Calvin, listen to me one more time. Send me your wire information for Frito Lay and you will see how serious I am.
[They exchange personal bank information. And within seconds, everything is settled and looks good.]
Calvin: WOW… this is the first time someone actually had the funds to do something and not talk out of their ass.
J Mont: My name is J Mont…..money’s no object when i want something done. And make sure they make it to the FIGHT TOWER by Monday afternoon.
[J Mont hangs up the call and smiles.]
J Mont: I think that is the best gift I’ve ever given somebody. I really put some thought into this and hopefully he sees that.
35 Minutes Later
[J Mont finally pulls up to his eye appointment and parks illegally in the front of the building. Not having a care in the world for anything, he hits the lock button on the door and makes his way towards the front. The glass door automatically opens up and he’s inside. He looks at the wall of Doctors listed and sees the one he needs. She is literally right down the hallway to the right. Aftering making that turn to the right, he sees her door and opens it up. There is no one there, but remember, it’s Saturday and most places are closed on the weekends. He walks up to the counter and taps the glass window, and from the back walks Jacqueline.]
Jacqueline: Mr Montuori, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you. Come on in.
[You hear the door make a sound as it unlocks. J Mont opens it and walks in. She has the eye board set up and a chair for him to sit in.]
Jacqueline: So, my son is a big Fight Fan and I saw what happened in your match. So I have an idea what we are dealing with here.
J Mont: Who is your son’s favorite Fight wrestler?
Jacqueline: Believe it or not, he loves Dave the Dinosaur.
J Mont: Are you kidding me?
Jacqueline: Yep, and he just ordered the action figure and stuff pillow as well.
J Mont: You’re a DR, i think you need to check his head out for some trauma or brain damage.
Jacqueline: How dare you talk about my son like that. This appointment is over and there is no REFUND for you.
[Jacqueline storms out of the room, leaving J Mont in the chair alone staring at the eye board.]
J Mont: Welp, that went over well. Maybe I can find some eye drops they have around here and be on my merry way. And who needs a Refund anyway, it’s only Money. I can make more of it anytime I want.
[J Mont gets up and walks over to her counter and sees the clipboard with his name on it and some recommendations she had written down prior. One of them was the eye drops she had already left out. He grabs them, and slips it into his pocket.]
J Mont: This isn’t stealing either. It’s right here on her sheet and i already paid for it so fuck her.
[J Mont leaves the office, hoping this will help cure some of the blurriness in his eyes. Not far to walk down the hallway, he makes a left and is back at the front. The doors open back up and his G Wagon is still there with no ticket.]
J Mont: NEW YORK CITY…. My HOME….
[J Mont was about to get into his vehicle but he had a sudden change of heart. He looks over to the right and sees a bench. He walks over and takes a seat. Admiring all the trees with the leaves pretty much off of them. A slight breeze and cars going up and down the road. Very few people are out walking today. He leans down to fix the bottom of his Jordan Pants and as he looks up, he sees a bus go by with FIGHT NYC on it, but the faces of the TOP 25 showing James Raven, Shawn Warstein, Chris Page, Atara Themis, and Tara Fenix.]
J Mont: Are you fuckin kidding me? These newbies get all the hype from FIGHT while im one of the OG’s that kept this place alive and popping with all the ratings and moves i was making. Now, they wanna treat me like the bread crumbs left at the bottom of a toaster. I’m not going to stand for this.
[J Mont, with an open hand slaps the bench, leaving his hand red and throbbing from the impact.]
J Mont: This Tara Fenix is going to see first hand just like Jennie that when you mess with TWIZTED THOUGHTZ, you’re entering a game you cannot win. Is this what you want FIGHT? Is this what you want NSQ? Is this what you want, Prestons, Riggs, Moores, Stratfords? You want the old me? Well guess what? You got it!!!!!
[J Mont looks all amped up now. Kinda reminds me of Ray Lewis of the Baltimore Ravens giving his pep talks to the team in a huddle.]
J Mont: Now Tara wants to throw in her 2 cents all because of Jennie losing last week to me. I think Tara needs to take those 2 cents, and get any kind of brain power she can get with it. For starters, how dare her leave ME off of the Charity Cruise Event. I was one of the hottest stars at that time. I had 2 belts with me in Manhattan and the Island. I also was all over the news, magazines and TV. But no invite. And I never forgot that and was waiting for the right time to get some revenge from that. And this is it, but the funny thing is she requested this match. I cannot believe FIGHT gave her what she wanted. Once again shows ME how much they truly think of me now. I feel like that veteran baseball player who is having a good season but there is some newbie in AAA having a great season. He gets the call up and I get bumped. Seems that is what they are trying to do with me here in FIGHT. Go ahead and cater to Tara, but you are being warned. You fired the first shot, but MY SHOT is going to be IMPACTFUL.
[Some more thoughts start running through J Mont’s mind like Usain Bolt in the 100 Meter dash in the Olympics.]
J Mont: As I sit here, you have Tara running around like she is the queen at number 12 but let me tell you one thing. There are 2 women in this world I could call a Queen. My future wife Mia and the number 42 Vhodka Black would kick the shit out of Tara in this ring too. And I’m going to dedicate this win to Vhodka because she should have been ranked better then they gave her.
[J Mont points up to the sky, showing a sign of respect because he knows his brother from the old group Focus, Jason Jarrett is looking down on him. He knows Jarrett is proud of the man he is becoming but also knows deep down that Jarrett wants him to fix the errors he made on the way by getting soft and complacent.]
J Mont: Sometimes, it’s good to sit back and think about things for a minute. It’s very hard in this business to get that alone time. You’re either training, doing commercials or interviews. Having matches or traveling to big shows. You also need time with your significant other. This right here is good for my health right now. Sitting here, enjoying the day and thinking of ways to piss off and beat Tara. And as i think about it, she really needs to get a new hair color. Blue looks so much better on Juliette Lewis, Ramona Flowers, Katy Perry, Gwen Stefani, Kate Hudson, and a few others. She might as well shave her head when I get done with her. That will be the best look for her. Then the completion of beating the Fenix family will be complete.
[J Mont cracks his neck to the left and then to the right.]
J Mont: People are gonna hate and that’s what they do with me. Everyone loves to hate me because I’m just that damn good and always have a plan of attack ready. That’s why they call me one of the best when it comes to mind games. You can’t teach that, you just have it. And Tara, pool ol Tara, you will fall into these games. We aren’t sitting here playing Fifa on the PS5 or getting our headsets and playing Call of Duty, This is REAL, not FAKE. You better get ready for what is coming to you. And that is some TWIZTED shit that is going to make you think “Why did i want to face J Mont?” You asked and you shall receive. And thankfully this time, i don’t have to worry about Candy Canes or ladders or fuckin Dust. I can just go to war and show you why I’m one of the best in the business even though they never wanna recognize me for it. And hopefully you did your homework on me and studied a little. If you don’t, you’re gonna make it too easy for me.
[Let the countdown begin. Number 12.]
J Mont: And Tara thinks she is the real number 12. When I think of the number 12, only 1 name comes to mind.
J Mont: Tara can’t even clean this man’s cleats. Can you sit here and claim you have done all that this man has done? ABSOLUTELY FUCKIN NOT! Has she been the best breakthrough athlete? Bert Bell Award? Comeback Player of the Year? Sports Illustrated Sportsperson of the year? Associated Press Male Athlete of the year? Best Male Athlete of the year Espy? NFL Offensive Player of the year? Best NFL Player Espy? Most Valuable Player? And how about 7 SUPER BOWLS?
Number 12 My Ass- Tom Brady is the REAL Number 12
J Mont: The day she can match all these feats and accomplishments of this man, maybe i will see her as number 12, but all i see her for is a tall version of a Smurf. And then to top it off, she calls herself the PHOENIX QUEEN. Like I said before, you’re not a queen or close to it. And you’re using the Phoenix name when you haven’t done shit to deserve it. When I think of Phoenix, I think of the Desert Botanical Garden, The Zoo, the Scottsdale Civic Center, the Phoenix Suns, Chase Field, The Art Museum, The Hot Air Balloon Rides…..but never do I think of Tara Fenix when it comes to Phoenix.
You Barked up the wrong Tree
J Mont: But I’m not a bad guy when the going gets tough. As a matter of fact, I even got an idea for you after I beat you and ruined your career Monday Night. I know the holidays are going to suck with Jennie losing and then you losing, but look at the bright side. I already made the call for you and they are waiting for you to come in to start working when we are done in that ring.
J Mont: You can thank me later. They are nationwide so you can pick any city you would like to work at.
[J Mont lets out some laughter. The last time he acted like this, he ended up winning the Toxic Tag Wars with Dane Preston so this doesn’t look like a good sign for Tara here.]
J Mont: And keeping up with the tradition of Phoenix. There is a better chance of Lisa Marie Ashton coming back and winning the Empire World Title then you getting the Phoenix Wings put on me. I’m going to clip your wings and watch you fall to the ground.
Pretty Bird, Yes, can you say pretty bird? Pretty bird, yeah pretty bird….Tara wants a cracker?
J Mont: If you’re smart enough, you will understand what that means. I’m going to take your head off and watch someone pet you while your head is wrapped in scotch tape. When i hit you with the JKO, you will be laying there on the canvas, hopefully your head is still connected for the sake of the holiday season, but i can’t predict that. But one thing i can predict is, when i get done with you, the people that chose you as number 12 will sit back and say, maybe J Mont should have been there. And the city of Phoenix will invite me there to give me a key to the city. You should have never asked for this match.You caught me at the wrong time. A time when a plan is in motion and I’m back to my old ways.
[J Mont gets up off the bench and heads back to the G Wagon that is still in the same illegal spot.]
45 Minutes Later
[J Mont pulls up to the condo and parks his vehicle. After getting out and making his way towards the door, he stops.]
J Mont: Home Sweet Home… a great song by the way and another good Motley Crue song. But a song by Motley Crue that I want Tara to remember is Don’t Go Away Mad. Because after you lose, you still need to be there for the Queens Champ Jennie and whoever else actually likes you.
[J Mont smirks and makes his way inside. And up the elevator he goes. Ignoring any music that can be heard. DING! The door opens and he is HOME. He kicks off his Jordans, and takes off the jacket. He walks towards the bedroom but Mia is not there. He then checks the kitchen, same result. He is starting to wonder if she went out or is avoiding him. But then out of nowhere, she jumps on his back and gives him a kiss on his neck.]
Mia: I know you missed me.
J Mont: I always do.
Mia: How did the appointment go?
J Mont: Let’s just say we need to take her off the list of Doctors we use.
Mia: And did you get that special gift you were looking for?
J Mont: It will arrive at the Fight Tower Monday afternoon.
Mia: Look at you Mr Getting Things Done.
J Mont: There is one thing I do want to get done for X-Mas.
Mia: What is that babe?
J Mont: A little Mont.
[Mia stares at J Mont. She was not expecting that comment to come out of his mouth, but she also isn’t mad either.]
Mia: Well, we really need to sit down and talk about this. That is a big commitment and decision that changes our lives and everything. I’m not against it, but we have to be ready for that.
J Mont: I know. Trust me, I know.
Mia: Where is this coming from?
J Mont: I did a lot of thinking today and it’s time I think about our Legacy and Future. A Baby Mont is what this world and US need. I also thought about how I have been getting overlooked by FIGHT lately, wondering if I should take all my talents 100 percent over to the XWF.
Mia: FIGHT needs you and they know it. You have real friends there. You don’t know anyone over at the XWF.
J Mont: You may be right. I just need to get this win over Tara Monday night and then enjoy the holiday break with you before the new year and the unveiling of the plan.
Mia: Are you ever going to fill me in on this plan?
[Just then, you can hear J Mont’s phone ring and he pulls it out of his pants pocket. Mia, being a little suspicious, looks over to see who it is. You see the name FOCUS on the caller ID again.]
Mia: This is your plan?
[J Mont answers the phone right after Mia states her question.]
J Mont: Yeah, everything is unfolding perfectly. People think they got it figured out, but they are connecting all the wrong DOTS. See you soon.
[J Mont hangs up the phone and looks at Mia.]
J Mont: Trust me baby, this is for the best and everything is on the up and up. I will never put you in a situation again that could hurt you. And I feel so confident about that, I have another idea. Why don’t you come down to the ring again with me Monday Night and watch me knock off another Fenix?
Mia: The pen is Blue. The Goddamn pen is Blue. HAHA. I will be more than happy to watch you knock the BLUE out of her.
[J Mont and Mia hug and kiss before they make their way back to the bedroom. Are they going to celebrate and make a baby? Stay Tuned…….]