Kneel before your God

By: Jason Ryan

Date: 15th Aug 2021

Jason is shown in a Catholic Cathederal, sitting cross-legged in the front of the sanctuary.

This is going to be a fun one. It would seem I am facing Father Child Grabber at Venom. And I would be lying if I said I wasn’t looking forward to this one. Because this guy really needs to have his teeth kicked in and I’m just the man to do it.

Jason reaches behind him and holds his Revolution 1 International championship in front of the camera before draping it over his shoulder.

Father Cock Sucker, I see you on Twiiter, talking about your faith will help you do this, your faith will help you do that.

Jason grabs the crotch of his pants

I got your faith right here pal!

Jason stands and walks over to a statue of the Virgin Mary. Withl a smirk he tips it over before facing the camera once more

Ya know Father 40 year Old version who never held hand with a girl that wasn’t his sister, who he’s not allowed to see due to legal issues, I am going to level with you, you are not going to make it here and I’ll tell you why. It’s you. A worse wrestler than a pastor and you’re a shit pastor. I mean, you don’t even know when God is speaking to you. Since it escaped your attention, God is right here Jack and you’re looking at him! And as God I have to say, I fucking hate you. You are not my child, I would strike you down but as your father can test, you’re not worth shit. But I will tell you right now, you may as well stop praying because I ignore all your prayers because they’re not important. 

Jason chuckles and looks at his championship

As a matter of fact I have decided you no longer get to be one of God’s children, because you don’t deserve that. you don’t get to enter Heaven either, you look like the villain from an internet safety video, probably because you’re the type that children have to be wary of when they go online. We all know what priests really are. Not my fault by the way, I may be God but I’m not responsible for what those fuckwits do. I just send them to hell where they belong. Which is what I will do to Father Timmy Turner.

Jason stands on top of the statue of the Virgin Mary

Listen you buck tooth scrub. While it is flattering you worship me, I don’t want the worship of someone who hasn’t shwoered in five fucking years. So here’s how it’s going to go. I am going to give you an organic, all you can eat, five star, gourmet prepare ass whooping! But don’t worry my ex-child, I prepared a freestyle to ease your pain.

Now this may come off as cruel

 But let’s be honest, you’re nothing but a tool

And you’ll never ever reach my level

Preperation is everything, so go on to the shed and grab a shovel

I am the God you revere, don’t forget it

I showed your mother before I hit and quit it

I am the undisputed best

And I think it’s time I put your ass to rest

And I love the priest outfit in case I haven’t told you

Makes you look like a little hoe

I am one if the best wrestlers ever to exist and I’m not even close to being done

So get on your knees and praise your God, you can all me daddy son

Your prayers are as useless as you wrestling run

I don’t pay attention to them, I’m too concerned about the important ones

You’re in a no win situation

And you’re presistent and annoying, like your genital condition

Squashing you will be one of the great clips played when I’m put in the hall

People only know who you are because you’re facing me, suck my holy balls!

With a smirk, Jason gives a mocking bow then straightens up

Father Whoremaster, as far as Venom is concerned, you picked the right day to get fucked up! Feel free to pray to your God but spoiler alert, I won’t be listening.