Poor Unfortunate Souls

By: Austin Ramsey

Writing Prompt: Yes

Date: 26th Jan 2022


Tuesday, January 11, 2021
1:18 p.m.
The Ramsey Neighborhood
Manhattan, NY



“Time To Burn The House Of Mouse Down”


All #28 versions of Austin Ramsey seemed to be at peace as he walked his babies, Duke and Domino, around the neighborhood. He and Todrick had cuddled and watched The Little Mermaid earlier. As they watched the movie, he looked down at her lying on his chest, and things began to click for him. She was his Ariel, and he was her Prince Eric. Prince Eric wasn’t half bad if he had to be a Disney character. Fuck Prince Charming; he had a great kingdom that was by the sea. He had kick-ass dogs, and everyone swooned over him all the time.

People pretended to hate him, but Austin knew he was loveable, and it was tough to stay mad at him. He knew his strengths and weaknesses, and he’d snatched the baddest fish under the sea. He was on top of the world as long as she was a part of his world. He fell into his thoughts as the dogs began to walk their Daddy.

Today has been such a good day. I haven’t had to see or smell Bam Miller, who is probably at Ani’s smelling like old fish heads and ass crack. God, I can’t wait to beat his ass at Blood Money 2. What I wouldn’t do to ensure he didn’t get eliminated until the end, and it was me, him, and Toddy, left in the match then Toddy could kick back as he finished Bam with the Cunt Punch, and then Toddy and him closed the show.

I really hate Bam; at this point, I don’t remember why but the Council of Austin’s took a vote, and we got unfinished business. Whatever happens at Blood Money, prolly won’t be the end of it, but I get to embarrass that fucker in front of millions of people. It’s what I do, and it’s what I live for. I’ll destroy whatever is in my path to make sure I get to him and then get to the end. Even if that means I fuck up the head cheese Mickey himself.

What sadist decided to ruin our childhood dreams and memories before burning down the House of Mouse? I like that person and all they stand for. Hehehe. Damn, I really need to get my promo done. Why not get it out of the way right now.

Austin takes out his phone and begins recording himself as he continues strolling around the neighborhood.

Austin Ramsey: Who’s bright idea was it to have the inmates burn down the fucking House of Mouse? Austin likes it; we blew the tower to hell, which made people like Bam Miller a homeless piece of trash again. God, that guy is useless, but you all already knew that. He really is a poor unfortunate soul that needs help from every Scar, Ursula, Cruella, and Jafar out there. No one believes he can do anything on his own, and it shows. Even his sister takes time out from her daily railing by that Sabin kid to fight his battles. Hehehe.

Bammers, I’m going to do you a favor, I’m going to make you famous, and you won’t even have to say a word. We really aren’t impressed with your blabber, and the way you gossip is a bore! We all much prefer that you don’t say a word because what is all your idle babble for anyway? We all know a conversation isn’t your strong suit anyway. It’s why you need to join every fed or show out there, and then you run in, get your ass kicked, and then you go on a pathetic motorcycle ride after you get released from your homeless shelter, the hospital.

Bamy, you are a poor unfortunate soul that couldn’t pay the price, but I am going to rake you across the coals for free. But you gotta get to me first, Flounder, the squishiest guppy in the sea. Now, I admit that I’ve been a nasty in the past, but on the whole, I’ve been a saint. I want you to be memorable in a home base somewhere, so I’m going to throw everything in the sea witches cauldron and then throw it on you. I want to help one of the most unfortunate merfolk in the sea. Yes, I will get your name out there after working my magic.

Magic is a talent that I’ve always had, no one can ever call me boring, and people are always watching, and let’s face it, that’s why you showed up on my doorstep. When I’m done, I’ll make you a decent human, and if you stick with me, I’ll make you a little less gross every day. So what do you say, Blam? Can you survive long enough to make it to me at Blood Money 2?

Oh, and there is one more thing, we haven’t discussed the subject of payment. Now I know that you don’t have much, so I’m not going to ask for much, just a token really, a trifle! What I want from you is – your blood flowing down your face and into a puddle on the ground. Now don’t take too long to decide because I’m a very busy Prince and I haven’t got all day, it won’t cost much, just your blood. If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet, you’ve got to pay the toll, take a gulp and take a breath and go ahead and sign my scroll. Duke and Domino, I’ve got him now, boys, the boss is on a roll. This poor unfortunate soul.

Beluga sevruga, come winds of the Caspian Sea. Larengix glaucitis, et max laryngitis, la voce to me. Now Bleed! Aah…Keep Bleeding!

Well, now that that’s out of the way and Hades has been addressed, let’s move on to the others. I’m sure everyone is going to come out of the gate talking about what they are going to do the NSQ, but who gives a fuck? Really who, I’ll wait; actually, they owe me a debt of gratitude. If it wasn’t for that pivotal moment when I finally showed my face at Ascension, I changed the entire game and told everyone on the entire roster to suck by big, phat dick. Austin changed the whole path of season two, ME!

Everyone else went out there singing with their beautiful voices, telling you what they would do and how they would win, and look what happened. So I guess saying that, some of you would say I’m the Ursula of this story, but that is incorrect. I am Prince Eric, and I will prove it to you. Everyone got lazy and complacent but turned their noses up at me, but as the Prince of the land, I couldn’t allow that, so I gave them my ass to kiss at the moment when it hurt the most. They had all fought on night one, and they were tired, battered, and nearly broken, so I swooped in at the last minute and saved my kingdom.

I gave them something to fight for, something to believe in themselves again. Whether they want to admit it, I made them all better. Me! I sent them on a journey where they could all rediscover who they were and what they were made of. But what did they do with that opportunity, you ask? They squandered it; that’s what they did. They began to fuck doctors, party uncontrollably at The Velvet Rabbit, and phone it in. Instead of working harder, they bitched and moaned about NSQ running everything, and they continued to let them do it.

Don’t get me wrong, fuck the NSQ; I’m not on their side in the slightest because they began to declare themselves the rulers of Pride Rock, and look what happened when Scar and his hyenas moved in, they got ran the fuck outta town, and FINALLY, someone has decided to do that. It’s no surprise that it is my big brother, Brandon Moore. Paul Montuori is finally back to top fighting shape, and who do you think kick-started that journey? ME! Prince Eric takes good care of all of his subjects. Now he is back on top where he belonged a long time ago.

Austin has had his share of ups and downs along the way, but whether any of yous wants to admit it, it was me all along, Austin! See that Bamph, that’s how you make a fucking impact, that’s how you change the entire face of a company, and everyone knows your name. Sure they know Sahara, Ricky, Shawn, James, Atty, Dave the Dinosaur, SEB, Jenxie, Tara, Michelle, Peter Vaughn, that asshat Jonny Frenz, JMONT, Dane, Dickie, Betsy, Ani, Chris Page, and even my beloved, Ariel, who you know as Todrick, but they will never forget Austin. I have the keys to this kingdom, and when you decide to ride this ride, you will never be the same again.

I’ll make you famous, and Blood Money will be no exception. Everyone has grown to expect the unexpected from FIGHT, but they have also learned that life is like a box of chocolates, and you never know which #Austin you will get.

It’s up to all of you to make your way this time, a few of you. I’m sure that I will help you understand that life is full of tough choices. I’ll make couples turn on one another, friends and lovers fight, chums will want to kick each other’s bums, and I will stand back and watch the chaos that I’m going to create unfold. I will cause the stampede that will finally end the disease known as Bam, and then I will walk out on the balcony of my castle and wave as I am the ultimate victor with my hand raised high in the sky. You will get all the malice you expect from Austin, but you will get a clever and cunning person who will control the rage. You have forgotten that I rule the land, but I shall remind you.

My second match in OPW was a championship match for the Southern Heavyweight Title; after one match, Austin was the one they wanted to see. After Blood Money 2, Austin is the one that they will continue to see. I’ve always had it in me, and now we find ourselves with a rare opportunity for me to show everyone that big things come in small packages. Princes are meant to rule and rule I shall at the end of Blood Money. You will finally be at the feet that you were always meant to bow at. Austin loves all of you poor unfortunate souls. See you soon!

Austin stops recording and begins to guide the dogs back toward Casa Ramsey.



Tuesday, January 11, 2021
2:18 p.m.
The Ramsey Neighborhood
Manhattan, NY



“You Are A Part Of My World”

After walking their dogs, Austin Ramsey comes into the house and sees his wife deep in thought. He walked up to her and kissed her on the top of her head. She looked just like a fairy tale, and he knew that his Ariel was dreaming. She was a dreamer, but she also got results.

Austin Ramsey: “Don’t move, I’m going to record you, and you are going to talk about Blood Money 2. Just be natural, my Princess Ariel.

Todrick begins to think to herself, “This is why I love him; he called me Ariel just based on how I’m dressed. We were meant for one another, and no one will ever be able to convince me any different. I love you, Prince Eric.

Austin begins to record Todrick, who makes a cute face and smiles as she looks into the camera on his phone. As she spoke, he marveled at the contrast in their styles. She was friendly but firm; she let them know that she wouldn’t take any shit, but she was not borderline angry like he was. She had taught him so much because if you’ve ever seen an Austin Ramsey promo, he was a ball of anger and rage the entire time. More of his personality had shown through early, and he even cracked a few jokes. That hadn’t happened in a considerable amount of time. It even felt kinda good though he would never admit that out loud.

His Ariel was definitely the best thing to come out of the sea and presented to him. Her words flowed with such elegance and poise. He had made her better in the ring, and she was making him better on the mic when it came to his pent-up rage. When she finished, he fell in love with her all over again. He was always falling in love with her like it was the first time, no matter what she did. When he wasn’t being an asshat and getting into trouble, he walked over to her and kissed her on the top of her head. Her words had touched him, and the song Part Of Your World stood out to him.

Contrary to popular belief, some of the #Austins were quite intelligent and picked up on things, though some of them were always genuinely confused at things. Today, however, Austin was firing on all cylinders. He understood the hidden message in what she said because he saw her tear up during the movie earlier when the song came on. He saw the pain when King Triton destroyed the cavern and constantly tried to keep Ariel in the sea. He saw the pain when Sebastian tried to keep her under the sea. He saw the understanding when she made a deal with Ursula and finally had her legs.

He saw the love they shared from the moment she laid her eyes on Prince Eric and how she never let adversity stop them. He saw the bright shine in her eyes when Eric and Ariel finally got married and had their happily ever after. He pulled her up, and they began to slow dance; it didn’t matter if there was no music playing.

Austin Ramsey: You know that you are a part of my world, right?

Todrick Tabor-Ramsey: I know, Baby. It’s just…

Austin holds a finger up to her lips and looks deep into her eyes.

Austin Ramsey: Don’t you dare. You are a part of my world, and that is enough. I know that you think I walk freely among them, but I have my own set of challenges, and I don’t quite fit their mold but fuck them. They don’t feed, fuck, or finance us, so their opinions don’t matter. Opinions are like assholes, and everyone has one. Sweetheart, we will be together, whether we are on the land in this palace or under the sea with a hot crustacean band. It doesn’t matter if you have a fin or legs to me. I will always love you.

Don’t dwell on this like you have to make a decision. Prince Eric put a ring on it, and our love continues to evolve and grow. Even if we have to beat the hell outta each other at Blood Money 2. I learned my lesson about underestimating what you can do. Season one of fight and therapy taught me that you have the goods to deliver. It doesn’t matter what’s in the shed; it’s what you do when you are out there swimming in the sea or walking on the land.

Mr. Giraffe is gonna love you no matter what you choose to do. He loves you right now and is making it really, really hard for me to concentrate. But our creepy four-legged children look like they would watch. Hehehe.

The two laugh, and Austin spins Todrick around and pulls her closer. He has to adjust a bit, but he makes it works, and she giggles as their hips continue to sway.

Austin Ramsey: My Ariel, listen to me, you have the best of both worlds right now, you can thrive in the sea, and you thrive on land. You are unique, and I want you to realize that and stop wondering if life in the bowl on land is better. One day you may have to return to the sea, and I don’t want that to be a disappointment. It’s a temporary happiness but think of what our trans brothers and sisters still have to deal with. I don’t want you to believe that it will wipe away everything once you do this. It just opens us, and yes, I mean us, to another set of challenges.

If you want to do this, don’t do this, thinking all your problems will go away. You do it because you know that you can’t live any other way. I wouldn’t be a good husband if I didn’t point that out to you but just know that there is nothing we won’t conquer. Exhibit A is Blood Money in a few days. You focus on that, my dear; we have the rest of our lives to choose our permanent kingdom, be it the sea or this castle. You get what your Prince is throwing out there?

Todrick Tabor-Ramsey: I am a part of your world, and that is enough. I love you, Austin.

Austin Ramsey: I love you too, Todrick Tabor-Ramsey. Emphasis on the Ramsey part.

The two continue to dance as the scene fades.