The Firstborn of the Firstborn
By: Le’Andra Fury
Date: 24th Aug 2021
Xavi’ is sad for me, because this happened. And I am sad for him because there was nothing I could do to stop it. I’ve seen him with his nieces and nephews, the young ones and the old. I wonder if he imagined them as his and what it would be like when he finally had his own, much as I would daydream and imagine the same. It makes me sad to see him only get one, when his brothers have so many. We agreed to just be here for each other. He’s still working like normal, at home, if the day permits and when he’s at the office he calls Chan and I every hour on the hour; me to see if I am okay and Chan to see if I am lying about being okay. I sit at home and put on a stoic and brave face while being pampered by Chan. Mr. Chan, Gods, I believe that he’s making up for the tears he feels that Xavi’ and I should be shedding.Le’Andra placed her hands on her stomach and looked down, when the membrane separating the twins finally gave way, a battle began; they thought it was heartburn with all the buffalo flavored everything she had eaten the past few weeks. They called it vanishing twin syndrome, which happens in 35% of twin pregnancies. And right now the only thing that Le’Andra and Xavier could do was sit there and be helpless as the female twin devoured the male twin, literally one ate the other. The doctors had told them that there was nothing that could be done, except for letting nature take its course. She didn’t want nature to take its course. She wanted them both. Xavier and her had joked about naming them Xavier and Le’Andra and nicknaming them X2 and L2, if there were one of each. Now X2 was gone, the only sign he had even existed was two sonogram pictures and his parents thoughts and memories.
The phone call to my mother was interesting, she cried and offered her condolences as a grieving grandmother should do. But, when the grieving grandmother is the leader of a viking clan whose first leader was a female killed by her own brother; she saw it as a sign. She is convinced I am carrying the spirit of Rusla the Red Maiden and she was avenging her death against her brother, Tesondus while still in the womb. This Firstborn will be the greatest in the long line of Firstborns… etc, etc. You know my mother and how she is with the Clan business. She has asked that Xavi’ and I to return in November for Alfablót. It’s a holiday that honors the family’s ancestors and she’s hoping they will escort the spirit of my son back with them…. My son… The wound on her heart ached for a moment before she choked a lump that had formed back down her throat. Mother’s moving Clan Wars to then as well. I told her she’s really got to stop moving the Wars around mine and Xavi’s life events. My mother laughed and said that as leader of the First Clan she can do what she wants. My vow when she steps aside and I become Leader of the First Clan not to do that shit, the war games will be right when they should take place at the beginning of autumn. That was bullshit with the snow on the ground last year just to include our wedding. Not that I have to worry about fighting in this year’s Games.Mr. Chan walks in dressed in a crisp white shirt and dress pants, in one hand he balanced a tray with a protein shake and asked her if she needed anything; she told him no and thanked him for the shake.
Not saying that “our girl” is out of the woods yet, there are still other complications. There will be weekly tests to make sure that everything is okay. Xavi’ has told me that even if things weren’t okay, this little girl was going to be loved and spoiled nonetheless. He’s already told me there will be no taking our child into the woods and abandoning it. He was joking but not joking, I told him that was so last century that we didn’t do that anymore; then we both agreed that mother probably shouldn’t be around her for a while. Of course, we were still joking, that’s a tradition she doesn’t follow nor approves of.She placed her hand on her stomach and gave it a rub.
We’re still working on a name for our princess, we’re waiting until after the first trimester to really start getting serious about it. The only thing we decided on was the middle and last name. Of course, she’s going to have the last name Black. Mother did try to convince us the Clan name would be better; she gave off a list of protections she would have with the name, but I countered with the same list of protections with the Black family name. Good try, mother, good try. Got to give you an E for Effort. Clan tradition she will share my first name as her middle. Xavi’ is insisting on a traditional nordic name since her middle and last are far from it. We are so not naming her after one of the Goddesses, that’s so cliche. I am sorry everyone out there who’s named their daughter Freya, Hel, or Frigg; but we’re going to give her a name worthy of her.She will be brave.
She will be strong.
She will be fearless.With everything they have been through, they would make it through this, it’s just what they do and this little girl would do it, too.